TobiIsAGoodBoy
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Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
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Jun 13, 2009 15:55:02 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Jun 13, 2009 15:55:02 GMT -5
Hello, my peeps.
I'm having quite a bit of a struggle with my stories. I have two in mind, but I don't really know which one to go in-depth with...
Which one would you take an interest in?
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Jun 15, 2009 9:44:07 GMT -5
Post by Joanna on Jun 15, 2009 9:44:07 GMT -5
Is the someone trying to take over the world one from the prospective rulers p.o.v.?
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TobiIsAGoodBoy
Junior Member
Full of Win
Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
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Jun 15, 2009 15:02:08 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Jun 15, 2009 15:02:08 GMT -5
Well, I guess you can take it that way, but no, not really.
It's more from an omniscient perspective, if you must know.
There's no specific p.o.v.
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Jun 15, 2009 22:44:10 GMT -5
Post by cristina on Jun 15, 2009 22:44:10 GMT -5
Would you mind describing the plots in a greater depth? If the plot itself is made more palpable it'll make it considerably easier to choose. Since, according to the nature of the plot, it insinuates the type of character and the range of events that will probably happen. I'm not asking you to write paragraphs, but even a few sentences could clarify some things lol
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Jun 16, 2009 12:27:48 GMT -5
Post by Joanna on Jun 16, 2009 12:27:48 GMT -5
XP I wana read about the psycho!!
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TobiIsAGoodBoy
Junior Member
Full of Win
Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
Posts: 50
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Help...
Jun 16, 2009 16:04:14 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Jun 16, 2009 16:04:14 GMT -5
Oh Joanna, you...[wags finger] OK, here's excerpt 1: A young boy no older than sixteen sat by himself a little away from the group. While they were busy trying to come up with a strategy in order to stop Fuzen from annihilating everything they held dear, the lone figure wanted no part in the discussion. It was just another troublesome topic to add on to the countless ones already in his throbbing head. Things were not going to bode well; only a few hours ago he had encountered the deranged man, and in doing so, he had been offered a choice. Fuzen wanted to test his loyalty: he had to choose in between saving the last of his family, whom the man is holding captive, or stay true to his warrior code of honor and prevent the fall of his country. The young teen let out a small whimper and shook his head fervently. He was still a kid, and kids were not supposed to think about things like this. Kids were supposed to play and have fun, while troublesome manners fell into the hands of adults...apparently, fate had other plans. Excerpt 2: The sun rose in the morning and shone upon the Northern Province. A young couple were still in bed, exhausted from their previous excursions from last night. The female woke up first; blinking the sleep from her eyes, they were revealed to be a light gray color when she fully opened her eyelids. Looking up, she saw the face of her lover, and a gentle smile made its way on her lips. Not wishing to disturb the tranquility of the moment, she simply settled for watching him sleep; deep, slow breathing filled the room coming from the male. After a few minutes passed, she sighed quietly and made to gather her clothes and leave the room, but not before planting a soft kiss on her lover's lips. Sadness then graced her features as she silently exited his bedroom and walked down the hallway to her own. She was tired, and not because of their couplings. No, she was tired of always having to leave early before someone caught them together and finding out the true nature of their relationship. For her, she did not feel ashamed of what they had done together, and she was sure that he wouldn't either. If anyone were to find out, there was no doubt that things would turn ugly. It is not because she had fraternized with the enemy or stolen from a merchant, no. He and she were not just lovers...they were siblings. Excerpt 3: Red dyed the sky as black smoke curled upward, toward the heavens. A lone figure made his way across the battle-scarred, debris-strewn land, his eyes fixed solely upon his destination. The events were all into place. Night had fallen, and he couldn't wait until the final puzzle was finished. The government was crumbling, their rule broken over the land they had once dominated. Many lives were lost in the process, yes, but life was just like the game of chess, that in order to proceed, pieces must be sacrificed. He stopped and looked over his shoulder to spot the distance of which he traveled. He had told the others that he would go alone, that no assistance was needed, and that he wanted to finish things once and for all. Their shouts of indignation and offers to help him fell upon deaf ears; he would hear none of it. Resuming his steps, his lips curled into a sinister smile, one full of hidden intentions and holding dark promises. He stopped again, another figure blocking his path. One he planned on removing out of his way. This was it. The last offensive. The end before a new beginning. The final showdown between Promises and Reality was about to commence. Sorry, it's a bit much.
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Jun 17, 2009 9:37:52 GMT -5
Post by Joanna on Jun 17, 2009 9:37:52 GMT -5
I like it! The incest was a shoker but it explained why the chick was beeing such a creep about going back to her room, and I would be suicidal if I had to be the 16 year old!! >.< Very nice relay of emotion I would say. Your evil person is so heartless!! DX That is probably the point though XD ((Can you tell that I like smileys?^.^))
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TobiIsAGoodBoy
Junior Member
Full of Win
Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
Posts: 50
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Help...
Jun 17, 2009 12:22:26 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Jun 17, 2009 12:22:26 GMT -5
Aww, thank you, Joanna~! Yeah, I've noticed that the subject of incest is sensitive and much-avoided, so I may decide to work on that. -_- I know, I'd be suicidal if I was the 16 year old too. Yes, heartless in majority...-_-" I could tell.
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Jun 28, 2009 17:19:41 GMT -5
Post by cristina on Jun 28, 2009 17:19:41 GMT -5
lol The incest one reminds me of a plot I considered a while back (it's not like yours so don't worry). This chick got raped by her aunt, so she became really reclusive and cold. Eventually she found this asshole guy and they kinda cancelled each other out and got freaky and all that and he started singing this song her dead mother used to sing and she's like and i'm laughing, YOUZ RELATED BIOTCH.. xD So they sort of didn't find out until they made babies. They freaked so bad haha Anyways, all three were quite intriguing, however the third had the most captivating diction, and was compartively more compelling. I'm guessing that was Creed of night? If you still call it my that title that is. That one seems your most developed story, and I remember you working on it sophomore year. Always go with your most matured plot, otherwise the plot holes will catch up with you.
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TobiIsAGoodBoy
Junior Member
Full of Win
Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
Posts: 50
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Help...
Jun 29, 2009 12:54:51 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Jun 29, 2009 12:54:51 GMT -5
Oh Crissie, your words mean so much...
...wow, you've got a warped mind. YOU ISH FUNNY, U.
[gasp] Aww, you remembered! Yeah, that was it. Oh, I do recall you saying that the title didn't make sense? Well, there's this institution called N.I.G.H.T. (an acronym, ya?)
So, technically, the title DOES make sense, since it refers to the purpose of the institute.
TAKE THAT, BIZNATCH...!
...sorry.
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Jul 9, 2009 17:48:03 GMT -5
Post by cristina on Jul 9, 2009 17:48:03 GMT -5
lol well I'm sorry, I don't know this stuff. I only watched you draw a few panels. However the character designs were interesting so that's probably how I remembered it. That and dive through the dictionary to find the definition of Creed xD
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TobiIsAGoodBoy
Junior Member
Full of Win
Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
Posts: 50
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Help...
Jul 23, 2009 18:44:49 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Jul 23, 2009 18:44:49 GMT -5
Heh, I'll have to admit, I didn't realize what 'creed' actually meant until I looked it up myself. By then, the title was already stuck in my brain. ^^"
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TobiIsAGoodBoy
Junior Member
Full of Win
Just because I'm not bad doesn't mean I'm good.
Posts: 50
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Help...
Oct 1, 2009 22:40:58 GMT -5
Post by TobiIsAGoodBoy on Oct 1, 2009 22:40:58 GMT -5
WAIT...!
I need assistance. Again.
Um, ok. What would you think is a more preferrable situation:
1) Getting your leg caught in a minefield and having them amputated
or...
2) Getting in a violent argument and end up sneding one of your closest friends/family members to the hospital and having them never forgive you.
[sigh] I'm so boring...
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